Sunday, May 22, 2011


My husband Will is awesome in his ability to deliver sensational, effective, and artistically divine head. I talk about it in my just-released juicy memoir The Nigel Sessions . . . Unleashing Sacred Desire (, but I want to explore it further here. Will's so good at giving head that I’ve fantasized about quitting all of my jobs, marketing him, and setting up shop with the slogan, “Guaranteed! You’ll Cum Back!” But alas, he’s not interested, and truthfully-- although still handsome-- he is no longer the roller skating Adonis he use to be of his younger years. And so my friends, I can proudly boast that I am the lucky sole recipient of his most excellent skills, and want to share some of this knowlege in order to foster a delicious pussy dining experience for all. This info is good for straight guys, lesbians, and bisexuals who want to please their female partners. If you are on the receiving end and feel like your partner can improve in this area, have them read this blog entry and perhaps they will be inspired to be more effective. As we all know, communication is the key!

After interviewing Will, and with some analysis on my part, I have determined that there are three “T”s that make for a genius headgiver: 1. Technique 2. Timing 3. Tenacity.


Just like a dancer’s vocabulary includes leaps, splits, turns, and shimmies, a great headgiver has a variety of skilled moves in his/her bag of tricks. For Will, these mainly involve the creative use of the mouth and tongue on the clitoris. Hands can assist by opening the vulva and exposing the clitoral region. Here are some of Will’s tops favorite techniques:

Flicker-- with the mouth securely around the upper vaginal opening and the bottom of the mounds pubis, the tongue flicks up and down or back and forth on the prime nerve plexus of the clitoris. Experimentation and personal artistry is needed to determine the speed, length, and intensity of the stroking.

Thrumb-- a long lick is administered to the clitorus from the middle of the tongue going from bottom to top., mouth disengages at the end. Repeat several times. These are longer, slower movements than the flicker.

Tug and Pull-- a gentle suction is created on the entire circular base of the clitorus with the lips. The tongue then assists as a foundation as the clitorus is firmly tugged and then pulled out of its hiding place from under the hood. Options are to hold the clitoris out in suspended animation for a while or to repeat again, but usually no more than three times in a row.

Nose Flossing-- the bridge of the nose makes firm contact with the perineum and keeps this contact as the face sweeps upwards towards the mounds pubis ending with brushing past the clitoris. Repeat numerous times in this upwards direction, usually with increasing intensity.

Pulse Press-- the broad base of the bottom third of the tongue is firmly held in place on the clitoris and he/she must wait to feel the internal pulse of the receiver. Once felt, the options are to continue holding still or to release and press again, not to be hurried.

*Please note that wiith all these tehniques, only the use of the head (tongue, mouth, nose) are explored for a continuous head-giving/getting experience in which an orgasm is often achieved. If more variety is desired, the use of the fingers/hands in either the vagina or anus can be also be used to enhance the fabulous sensations.


As an experienced drummer who plays the doumbek and djembe, Will’s sense of timing is uncanny. He knows-- to borrow from that Kenny Rogers song about gambling-- “how to hold, when to fold them, and when to let them go.” He’s that good. I often have a fantasy going on in my head when he’s giving head to me. I sometimes verbalize them, but most often not, so in other words, Will does not know what’s happening in one of my many cinematic scenarios (another post!!!) but he can brilliantly sense the “energy flow.”

This is his natural gift. It can, however, be learned and cultivated. From what I can tell, it’s all about being present in the moment. It’s about enjoying the small twitches, contractions, softenings, and electricity of the pussy, with the clitorus as the supreme queen. It’s about responding to the loud and soft moans that are made, the whole body movements. In musical terms, it’s as if the head-giver is the bass and drums keeping the song moving along, and the head-receiver is the lead guitar creating elaborate riffs. It is art. It’s about staying tuned-in, turned-on and, very importantly, relishing the meal. It’s fantastic!


From my experience, the inability to “keep it going” is the single most common downfall of not-so-great head. I asked Will, “What’s your secret?” ”It’s a Zen thing,“ he answered. I just get into it. I do what I’m supposed to do for as long as it takes, I love it!”

And that is the complete truth. For many years I had a diffcult time cumming and Will tried his damnest to help me. Finally we figured out that giving me head was the way to go. Will said that one day he decied that he wasn’t going to let me get up and go until I came; he was committed. He brags,”I couldn’t crack the nut, so I had to lick it!” And lick it he did and does. He never gives up, even if it means his legs fall asleep and his back starts cramping. He finds a way to adjust, often without removing his lips from my netherlips. I think the longest it ever took us was 1 hour and 15 minutes. Usually, nowadays, it take an average of about 20 minutes.

I attibute part of Will’s unrelenting tenacity to his high-funtioning autism. As many of you know, our son Peter is classically autistic. We have come to figure out that Will also has some of these traits to a much lesser degree. It is called called Asperger’s Syndrome. I find it ironic that one of the behaviors of this condition is often an uncanny ability to zone everything out and focus in on one thing. I’m convinced that Will’s head-giving stamina is due in part to this-- everything has a silver lining!

So there you have it, The Three T’s of Giving Great Head. Use this information and experiment and enjoy!!!

PS. If you have some head-giving tips of your own, please do share them with us in the comments section below.

Friday, February 11, 2011


I’m back!!! I know it’s been nine months since last I wrote and I apologize for this. The final stage of manifesting my book into this reality has taken all my creative focus.

And yes, success!!! I am proud to announce that The Nigel Sessions . . . Unleashing Sacred Desire will be ready in just a few days for your biblio consumption. What a fascinating, fabulous journey this has been! I am presently on the threshold of the next phase of this authorship process-- promoting and marketing. In other words, now that the baby is born, I’ve got to raise it.

But first, here’s a mini-synopsis of the process thus far. Many years ago-- at least fifteen I believe-- I began saying that I wanted to write a book. People would always tell me that I had really good stories, so I figured that one day I’d sit down and write about my unique perspective on life. The imaginary book had a working title of Sophia Agapedis on Sex, Yoga, Belly Dancing and Autism. In format, it would be loosely based on Mae West’s memoir that I have always loved and read way back in the 1970’s, Mae West on Sex, Health and ESP.

The inspiration to write, however, never happened until my sexual relationship with Nigel began in 2004-- yes, for sure, he was my muse. That first year of our affair, I was on an adrenaline roller coaster ride of such dramatic proportions that I knew that I had better start some intense journaling to chronicle it lest I forget the details. This was the URGE to write, that first diligent, constant effort to get pen to paper. I think I must have filled at least ten thick journals in the five year span of our affair, which ended last spring (sad, but true! I’ll talk about that in another post) right after that phenomenal Session #20 (a few posts ago, read it, hot!). Even though my sex with Nigel was my inspiration to write, my book actually does include a lot of my ideas on yoga, belly dancing, autism, and some phenomenal sex scenes with my husband Will and others as well.

I began the actual Nigel Sessions book a year into the affair and that was the beginning of the SUBMERGE part. The process of write, rewrite, write, rewrite has been one of self-actualization to say the least; memoir as a Buddhist practice! I’ve learned so much about myself with every revision. Actually, I've gotten nicer and nicer as I stripped away my angst and uncovered the core truth of what I wanted to say. What an adventure! I have felt on the VERGE of completion now for quite awhile, with me thinking that each of these last revisions was the final one. Yeah, it feels like it's been a long, long awaited cum and I’m about to shoot for the moon!

The last three weeks have been especially challenging because the book was actually published online for several days and some friends have already bought it. But when I got my galleys (two prototype books, soft and hard cover) for final approval before the big printing, I found some small changes that needed to happen (spelling, grammar, couple of needed sentences here and there). So I am awaiting those final corrections to be done and it should be available online next week sometime. It’s kind of like having a newborn in the neonatal unit; I want to take that baby home!!!

Still, I couldn’t wait to let you all know that The Nigel Sessions . . . Unleashing Sacred Desire is about to EMERGE! In a few days I’ll also have a 7-page excerpt up for you to read-- but you know you want to buy it! Right!!!

Here’s the URL so you can at least check out the web site.

I have to say I am very proud of this baby. It’s been five years in the making and I’ve never put so much energy into one art project. So please, buy it, read it, and if you like it, TELL ALL YOUR FRIENDS TO BUY IT! (only the open-minded ones, of course.)

Now that the book is done, I’ll be writing in this blog more and will keep you posted about future book readings and signings.